Friday, January 19, 2007
I have a secret. I have not been really good about keeping in touch with Kiley's Foster Mom. I feel really guilty about it. It is definitely has not been on purpose, it has been because I have been so busy. I will also admit it has been because of lack of funds. When I say we have no money I mean no money. No money to send pictures and definitely no money to develop pictures. Well today I changed that. I sent Mirina a bunch of pictures and a angle figure holding a baby. I feel much better but at the same time I still feel like such a loser. I have spoken to her since we returned but not as often as a I feel I should. I finally developed pictures from a disposable camera which we had sent in our first package. It was weird and yet surreal to see these earlier pictures. Not only did she look different but my baby had another life. She was accepted loved by this family as their very own. For example, there is a picture of her attending a birthday party. (My baby girl was a partier even there.) I don't know why this has hit me so much. Has anyone else felt this way?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
yeah, it's "hit me" too. When I start feeling the guilt strongly, I usually act on it. And when my letter or email is being sent to Savanna's fmom I usually hear from her! Weird huh? Savanna's fmom has the blog addy too so she can read what's going on. It helps to keep her "connected" when I don't have time or money to send her pics or personal updates. She can get the blog translated to Spanish. She does it frequently too.
Kiley's fmom will understand. She'll be grateful to get anything from you about Kiley.
Let go of the guilt, my friend. Life is too short to carry guilt around.
I've thought about this lately too. I was looking at some old pictures of Cameron and it's hard to belive that's even the same boy! His life is so different now, but at the same time I am so grateful to the family that took care of him in Guatemala. I feel like I should send stuff to his foster mom more than I have (which is honestly only once since he was home) but I have a hard enough time getting pictures developed for us, let alone for others. But I think that's probably the norm and we can't feel guilty about it. Just do what you can but focus your energy on your beautiful daughter!
Unrelated comment since I can't find your e-mail address.....do you ever visit Guatadopt.com? There is a photo of a little girl on there and someone is looking for the parents. Its hard to tell but it looks a lot like your daughter. You might want to take a look.
PS - She is ADORABLE.
Post a Comment